After much consideration, i decided to forgo my 15km passion run that i was suppose to go this morning at 0630am. The race starts at 0630am, so i need to reach the place at about 0600am in order for me to get ready cum warm up etc. But it was on a Sunday, all public transport will not operate as early as usual days which means that i will not be able to reach East Coast Park by 0600am. Even on normal days when public transport operates on a earlier timing, i might not have make it in time either. This will mean that i have to cab there which will cost me another 30plus dollars. I had looked in the internet to find all possible means for me to get to that place by 0600am but none of it will get me there by that time and i really do not want to waste another 30 dollars just for that 15km run. In the end, i decided to give up the run. Luckily i only paid 18 dollars for it because i was a passion card member and i think i registered on a early bird special, guess I just take it that i bought the running singlet for 18 dollars which wasn't that expensive after all.

I find that ever since i got posted to 163 SQN, I have been telling quite a number of lies which i would not have done so in the past. I really do not like the part of myself telling lies to other people and i feel guilty after saying it. But this place is really hard to survive, i think i am doing it to protect myself from any more damage that will be inflicted on me if i had not done so. I went to Alpha flight in quite a bad shape and i had problem trusting people and getting close to them especially people from NS. Well, it's really like a game of survival and i wonder when i will be the next one to get voted out of tribal council and my flame to get extinguished. Then I will become this guy who just dropped into this deep abyss and forever falling into this space that consist of nothing with no end i will ever reach and I will be there shouting "Noooooooooooooooooooooo"! Finally. i will become this evil guy who will then held a grudge against everyone in the world and will haunt this world even after i died. This is how bad i think my NS life is, so i think the one above will not blame for telling a few lies to protect myself right? I hope that's the case cause even though i am not into any religion, i do believe that there is someone above us controlling everything and things happen for a reason which i will eventually find out during my after life.

To outsider, i had already withdrew from my GP examination but few or none currently will know the truth behind it. Anyway, "giving up"my GP examination does not mean that i had given up on improving my English. As of yesterday, i have started reading newspaper and i will continue to do so everyday. I will take down every word that I do not know and find out the meaning behind it put in down in a small notebook. Soon i will create another blog for my English stuff which everything in it will be about English(obviously). I am not making any sense again and that is how bad my English is which does not matter because no people will be reading this anyway. But i am really quite determine now to make it work, I guess looking at people like clement really makes me feel like i will be able to do a little bit better if i am just willing to put in that little bit of effort more. Come on people, watch me as i work along that line now!!!!