all my time and effort which i put in last sem had prove to be completely useless!! all the late night coffees...weekends burned...no life no friends no nothing...ITS COMPLETELY USELESS...did all this for what?? just for the kicks of spending more money to review my paper?? i cant believe it...i guess im really not suited for studying...what else can i do??? i dun see anything in life which im interested in...why why why??? i tot if i really work hard and believe in hardwork for once...it will pay off...instead it just totally backfire on me...im so scare now i wun be able to get into environmental...i need to get in...I NEED TO!!! only by getting into environmental will i then be able to really convince myself that spending one yr in architecture wasn't a mistake!! haiz...im so screwed! going into a mental breakdown soon! and i cant tell this to anyone...i realise no one around me can listen...or willing to listen and still be on my side...majority of ppl will only try to console me by telling me how more screwed up he or she is than me. then whats the point?? its not like im campaigning to see who can be the president of having a more screwed up life! which is why im more and more unwilling to listen to ppl's problem...whenever anyone has a problem...i will try to put myself in their shoes and say all the stuff that will make them feel good...totally never get this from anyone...im very close to be done with everything/everyone around me! god damn it!

haiz...anw my gpa got 3.81...ppl will prob say its not that bad at all...but if u noe the amount of time i put into studying...u will noe 3.81 is fucking cui!! other ppl will prob get gpa 5million if they studied like i did! haiz...enough said...im so depressed........................................

so ytd i went back to sch for instep talk...go listen for fun since i only intend to go during yr2 sem2...plus i might go GIP instead of instep...hahaha...oh and i saw yicheng and avin there too...i saw avin first but i din see yicheng...so the very first moment i saw him i tried to turn and walk away until yicheng called out to me...damn it! and then a very interesting conversation btw me and yicheng

me: oh going for exchange eh...where u intend to go to?
yc: oh planning to go korea
me: eeeee...why of all places korea??(laughters in the background by avin i think)
yc: then where u wan me to go? go THAILAND with you???
me: *totally stunned* pls go away...i dun feel like talking to u alr

maybe my first reaction of eeee when he said korea wasnt very nice...but its nothing personal...prob cos im not a korea fan?? or i tot exchange should go more exotic and faraway countries(which is the norm??)?? or i jus dun like korea??? but its all jus me and nothing about yc or whatsoever! but the moment he put THAILAND into the conversation...it is fucking personal and insulting...come on dun try to tell me it meant nothing when any morons could see what he is implying...haiz...ok yc...i guess its goodbye to you too...not that it matters...we werent any close frenz to begin with...

results day...haven checked yet...hahahahahahahahha